Primal Loss: The Now-Adult Children of Divorce Speak with Leila Miller

This past week, Leila Miller joined the show to discuss her latest book and the damaging effects that divorce has on children.

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About Cullen Herout

Cullen is a husband, father, writer, and lover of Truth. He has a Mental Health Practitioner License in the state of Nebraska, and has years of experience working with persons struggling with mental illness and addiction. For the past four years, he has also been involved with Rachel's Vineyard ministry for post-abortive women, serving as the counselor for their weekend retreats. Cullen's work has been featured at The Blaze, Crisis Magazine, The Washington Examiner, The Federalist, LifeSiteNews, Live Action News, Catholic Stand, and more. He has a passion for writing about pro-life issues, Marriage, fatherhood, and building a culture of life. He lives in the midwest with his wife and two sons.

3 thoughts on “Primal Loss: The Now-Adult Children of Divorce Speak with Leila Miller

  1. Of course divorce is hard on children.

    But so is living with parents who don’t get along, who don’t like each other any more.

    I lived with that for many years, I asked my parents to get divorced so they could be happy, so they could find someone they got along with and loved, to take the stress and tension of their depressing relationship off the backs of us kids. There’s two sides to this story. Sometimes staying together can be worse, even worse, sometimes much worse, than getting divorced.

    They were determined to stay together, “What God has joined together . . .”, and so they lived a long unhappy life together, and what we saw and felt absorbed from that had very bad impacts on us kids’ ability to have good stable relationships, we did not grow up with a model of “happy marriage,” our guts tell us that marriage is unhappy.

    Some people hold to delusions that if the parents stay together the children will have good happy childhoods, but this is not always true. Some people hold to delusions that if a child is born, rather than aborted, he or she will be wanted and loved and have a good happy childhood, but our prisons and mental hospitals are filled with adults who were unloved, unwanted, abused, neglected, molested, emotionally abandoned children – child abuse, and passive abuse – neglect, abandonment – are the primary roots of most crime, most mental illness, and much physical illness. See Dr. Gabor Mate’s excellent books on this, “When the Body Says No: The Stress-Disease Connection,” showing prenatal and early childhood stressors as a primary cause or trigger for many diseases including heart disease, cancer, diabetes,
    “Scattered,” on prenatal and early childhood stress and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, and “In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction,” which convincingly links substance addictions and behavioral addictions to prenatal and early childhood stress absorbed from the child’s over-stressed parent or parents.

    Getting divorced may be a bad option, but sometimes not getting divorced is worse.

    • Wait… Did you just justify killing human beings due to the *potential* that they might suffer or sin?

      Let’s start with that.

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